A Mother's Love....

     I have spent much time today thinking about love.  In particular, the love a mother feels, and gives, to her child.  I believe this is the greatest earthly love there is...the love that is most reflective of the love God asks of us, and gives to us.  A mother falls in love the moment she knows a child is within her womb.  Everytime you hear the heart beat, or feel your baby move, you fall deeper in love.  Then the miracle of birth is given to you...an indescribable experience of pain and joy like no other.  During the painful moments and hours of labor, the love you have for your unborn child is what gives you the strength to endure the physical pain.  Already, you have an  unconditional love and determination to do anything for your child...to endure anything that is asked of you. 
     When your baby is born, you hold in your arms, what you consider to be a miracle.  Instantly, you feel an overwhelming love, one like you have never known.  A love so deep, you didn't even know it existed.  Your child has become the center of your world, your love, your life.  As your baby grows, your love grows.  You nurture, protect, and love like you have never done before.  These feelings, this love, fills every part of your being.  As your child continues to grow, because of this mother's love, you are always able to see into their heart, even when you don't like something they are doing.  You are able to move through any hurt to try and understand, because you know, and believe in their heart.  You see the good, and you never stop believing in that good, no matter what is going on.  You continue to love, protect, nurture, defend, and feel extreme pride.  You give them everything you have, selflessly, expecting nothing in return.  And if you are blessed to have more then one child, you feel the exact same feelings for each child....the heart of a mother grows with each child. 
     This kind of love is pure and genuine.  I believe it is given by God.  I believe it is the strongest and purest of loves on this earth.  Because of this, when a mother loses a child, the pain and loss are beyond words.  Unless it has happened to you, it is completely beyond comprehension.  Your child is your heart, your world...so when they are taken, a big part of your heart and world go with them.  The woman you once were is forever changed.  You don't know who you are anymore.  You are left empty, trying to make sense of it all.  Trying to pick up the pieces of your shattered world, when you barely have the strength to stand.  Trying to figure out how you will survive the anguish, and how much strength you have to endure it.  Trying to understand how you will ever find joy in the world again, when one that brought you so much joy is gone.  Trying to make sure your other children are OK, and know that your love for them hasn't changed....despite the fact your life has just been shattered, and love has been ripped right out of your soul.  You are left with your own pain and sorrow, but also the need to take care of your other kids....even when you feel you have nothing left to give.  Even when you question your ability to love again. 
     I am praying and trusting that my mother's heart  will guide me, in regards to my other kids, so they continue to know how much they are loved....even by their mother's broken heart.